Im feeling lonely lately. Ive just left where I have been living and am now, once again, in completely unchartered territory. Its Exciting yet emotionally restless.
I remember the same pictures consistently when my emotions cant seem to sufficiently unwind. She was standing by the door as I walked out, it was the last time she asked me to stay. Ever. The dark beer tasted far away. We were friends again, but only decided not to be. Why? A decision behind that look. He said it was his pleasure. I know it was because we’re still friends regardless how we feel. Forever. He cried, only because the option wouldn’t even be there anymore, not even the hope of the option. He didn’t look up, a decision had determined his also, so he continued replacing and forgetting. Hugs had limited or complete connection. Some of these people have grown, some have not. All have aged without me in their life. I miss them all. I know I miss them because it feels like yesterday.
You are most likely surrounded by the people who are going to create similar, undefined, emotional blips as these. What are you doing with those people? I promise they are worth every piece of energy you spend on them.
My perspective then was to correct the seething problems in all of my relationships so in the future everything would flow in a glitchless euphoria. I am in that past’s future. Its not glitchless euphoria! In fact, those problemed people make up the only glitches that I have in what could be considered a euphoria. They’re not here, that’s the glitch!
I have written, erased, written and erased these feelings over the past few days. This time Ive decided to post regardless. Partially for a release and partially to encourage you to hang on to the people who mean the most.
Rock On,
David Snader 